Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is less than a week away. For some this is a holiday that fills them with delight, while for others it's a day they dread.

Funny, my husband and I actually had our very first date on Valentine's day. I had known my husband 2 years prior to our first date. He had been one of my good friends. I used to hang out with him and vent about the guys I was dating, and he would listen (like a good friend does) and just tell me that I was choosing the wrong ones. I think I am like any girl when I tell you that I had that "bad boy" phase of my life. I always thought that I could "fix" someone. That was only fun for so long, and I started to see something different in my friend Jason.

One night he challenged me to go on a date with him. I kind of laughed about it at first, but then before I knew it there we were in the Applebee's in Bloomsburg, PA (our college town) on our first date. The surprising thing was that it wasn't awkward at all.

I remember the first time I went "home" with him to meet his mother, and I was amazed at the way he treated her. It was different than what I had seen before, and I have to say he was "different" than anyone else I had ever met. We were together through the rest of college. Then graduation came in 2000, and I stayed on to go to graduate school while he moved back home to work in the city. I didn't know how we would do it, but we did. It definitely wasn't always easy. In 2002 we were married. So hard to believe that we will be celebrating our 12th wedding anniversary.

I am no expert on marriage. I only can tell you what I know from my own experience.
I love Valentine's day, but its one day a year. I never expect anything amazing. What amazes me is the way that I am treated everyday. It's easy to "feel in love" when you are dating. You don't have the demands of finances, kids, real world stress (at least we didn't when we dated, I do realize everyone's situation is a little different).

There are so many different forms of love.
My girls love the Disney Fairy Tale movies. Their favorites right now are "Tangled" and of course "Frozen". I always loved the princesses and these stories as well. What little girl doesn't? Life certainly isn't a fairy tale.

Love is easy some days, and some days it is work. I am happy that I am married to my friend and that we had that basis first, because it's helped us through some rough times. Also, what has mattered is our faith. God can certainly do anything. The pastor that married us said that if both partners were moving toward God they would be moving towards one another. I know not everyone has faith, or finds this helpful, but it's something that has always helped us.

Love is not a fairy tale, life is hard.
I think other helpful advise we received when we got married was to be a team daily. It's not a competition about who had the worst day, who slept less, who is the most stressed...but about how we can handle it all together. I do hope that everyone has a very Happy Valentine's day, but just remember...its one day.

To those of you who are married, what is the best marriage advise you ever received? Please feel free to share in comments section! Would love to hear from you.