What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?

Remember this question? When I was a kid I could have given you the answer in 5 seconds flat. The 10 year old version of me would have told you that I wanted to be a teacher and a mom. I am happy to say that I was able to achieve both of these by becoming a teacher at 23, and then a mom at 27. I was so sure of myself. I thought being a teacher would be the perfect career to coincide with being a mom. I had a hard time balancing the two the way I wanted, and became a full time mom after the birth of my second child. So many people make being a working mom look like a cake walk. I sure wish I could have been like that. My oldest has asthma and allergies and was sick so much that it was impossible to be able to miss that many days, and a daycare environment had never been the best setting for her. I never thought I would enjoy being a full time mom, but surprisingly I really have. Of course I miss the social interaction, doing something of my own, and getting a paycheck (other than the hugs and kisses I know receive as pay).

Fast forward to the birth of my third child. Seems like yesterday he was born, and now he was just 10 months yesterday. In a way it is like having a first child again because both of my older ones are now in school all day. It is wonderful having this time with my "little man" as I like to call him. My oldest and I were just talking the other day about what she would like to be when she grows up. She has so many ideas, and I love to hear her dreams. She then turned the question around on me, and I found myself without a quick answer. I told her that I wanted to be a mom, and she said " you are silly...but what about when us kids are grown?". The crazy thing is that I know this day will come long before I am ready.

My husband turns 36 in a few weeks, and I always love to joke after his birthday that I am his much younger wife. In reality I am only 2 1/2 months younger. I remember the year we turned 30. It was a bit overwhelming. We have been together since we were 19. I am so fortunate to have spent my 20's and now my 30's with this wonderful man. Of course it hasn't always been easy, but whose life has. Even when you look from the outside of someone's life and think it's easy you just never know what they keep hidden. Anyway we are both finding that we are enjoying the 30's even more than the 20's. My oldest pointed out the other day that we will be 36 which is closer to 40 than 30. Glad she is getting a good education. 

I remember when my parents turned 40 and we had a big "over the hill" party for them. That was almost 24 years ago. I do not fear growing old. My faith assures me of my fate which is a comfort. I do seek God's will in my life, but sometimes I am not so sure of all of the answers. Some days I think I would love to return to the classroom. The jobs are not as prevalent as they were when I left the field. Some days I think I would just like to start taking classes so that I am ready for a new career when my son enters school. I guess I do not need to have all of the answers now. Maybe someday I will find the answer to what I want to be when I am grown up.

When did you know what you wanted to do with your life or are you still struggling to find the answers?